3/13/03

Yesterday morning I visited Ross in Burbank. He needed to make a hospital call so I tagged along. We went to the room of one of his congregation members, "Maria". "Maria" is vastly overweight and often sick. Ross introduced me as a fellow pastor and a "prayer warrior." I felt put on the spot and slightly resentful. I didn't really want to pray. I didn't "feel" like a pastor at that moment. Yet I was and I am. So I joined hands with "Maria" and Ross and we prayed; and as we prayed the power of something I can only describe as the Holy Spirit came over me--at least I suppose that's what it was. I found my eyes tearing up and my eyelids fluttering and blinking on their own. This happens to me occasionally when I pray and I don't know what to make of it. I've wondered if one can physically "feel" the Spirit; or is it just my imagination? I doubt the latter, but the former...I don't know. It isn't an every-time-I-pray thing and, in fact, on this occasion, I did not particularly even want to pray. Yet perhaps it was a reminder that the efficacy of God is not dependent on the instrument; a reminder that God can and will work when and how God chooses; whether or not I'm "feeling" particularly spiritual doesn't matter. It's a testimony to the sovereignty of God that even a reluctant prayer can be infused with the power of the living God. "Maria" sure seemed to think so.